Everybody
Hates Fruitcake
The poor fruitcake has been the
butt of holiday jokes for as long as I can remember. When I was writing EVERYBODY
HATES FRUITCAKE, I was definitely playing on the fruitcake
prejudices out there. Poor Ivan—one of the elves hired by Santa to take care of
his reindeer—has fruitcake flavored cum.
“What?” you say. “Fruitcake
flavored cum?!”
Yeah, in case you haven’t heard
all of Santa’s elves have candy flavored cum in THE
NAUGHTY NORTH POLE LOL And it only seemed right that one of them
would taste like fruitcake. Trouble is, Ivan knows all the jokes people say
about fruitcake, and he is afraid to tell anyone his secret. He thinks no one
will ever find him as delicious as the chocolate and peanut butter flavored
guys.
But Sheila—the head chef at the
North Pole and supervisor of Santa’s Christmas Cookie Baking School—thinks
fruitcake is delicious! She has been spending years perfecting her recipe, but
has never been able to get it right. When her wife Danni tells her about
Ivan....well, let’s just say Sheila is in the mood for some taste testing!
Ivan
has the bad luck to be the only elf at the naughty North Pole with
fruitcake-flavored cum—and he’s not telling anyone. When fellow elf Jimmy hits
on him, Ivan fears revealing his secret and losing a chance to have a real
relationship with the sexy elf.
After
all, everybody hates fruitcake!
Danni's
wife Sheila is the Head Chef at the North Pole. Unfortunately, while Sheila
hunts for the perfect recipe for fruitcake, she neglects her wifely duties. So
when Ivan tells Danni about his dilemma, she devises a plan to solve both of
their problems.
Can
these two girls help Ivan realize he is perfect just the way he is? Will
Danni's wife perfect her fruitcake recipe with Ivan's special ingredient? But
most importantly, will Ivan have the courage to take Jimmy up on his offer?
EXCERPT:
A soft hand caressed mine. “Why don’t you like Jimmy?”
Naturally, Danni wouldn’t let it drop. “It’s not
that,” I answered. “I like him a lot, actually. That’s the problem.”
She shook her head, her long black ponytail swaying.
“That makes absolutely no sense.”
“Of course you don’t get it.” I brushed a lock
of silky black hair off her brow. Her bangs were always falling in her eyes,
and she didn’t flinch from my familiarity. “You’re perfect.”
Grinning, she said, “Well, that’s obvious. But it
still doesn’t explain why you say you like Jimmy, yet you ignore all his
advances.”
“Because I don’t know if I should do anything
about it. He’ll just end up being disappointed.”
“I’m still going to go with, that makes absolutely no
sense.” She gave me a head to toe once over. I managed a smile when she tipped
back to take in my ass and give me a whistle—she was such a flirt. “You’re
gorgeous, Ivan. And you’re funny. You forget I’ve seen you take care of those
pathetic earthbound reindeer.”
“They’re not pathetic.”
“See what I mean? All the other Dökkálfar in the
stables prefer to work with the flyers. But not you. You’re kind and patient. A
real caregiver. So I ask you, what would Jimmy have to be disappointed about?”
I squirmed in my seat, unsure if I should tell her,
but desperately wanting to. I had not breathed a word of it since I’d arrived,
preferring to have my choice of lovers, rather than be laughed at like I had
been in my hometown. But something about the sincerity, the kindness in Danni’s
brown eyes made me feel like I should trust her. Like it was finally time to
tell someone the truth.
“Because I taste like fruitcake.”
Author Bio:
Deanna
Wadsworth might be a bestselling erotica author, but she leads a pretty vanilla
life in Ohio with her wonderful husband and a couple adorable cocker spaniels.
She has been spinning tales and penning stories since childhood, and her first
erotic novella was published in 2010. When she isn’t writing books or
brainstorming with friends, you can find her making people gorgeous in a beauty
salon. She loves music and dancing, and can often be seen hanging out on the
sandbar in the muddy Maumee River or chilling with her hubby and a cocktail in
their basement bar. In between all that fun, Deanna cherishes the quiet times
when she can let her wildly active imagination have the full run of her mind.
Her fascination with people and the interworkings of their relationships have
always inspired her to write romance with spice and love without boundaries.
You can find Deanna on:
Pick up your copy of EVERYBODY
HATES FRUITCAKE
today!
One lucky commenter will win their choice of a book from the previous
four in the series! I will draw a winner on December 26th
